***WARNING***
This entry talks about breastfeeding!
A year ago at this time I suffered from what they call Baby Blues after giving birth to my beautiful daughter. Today I suffer from what I call Booby Blues. I have not nursed Hana Grace once today. I know I should be grateful, and I am, that the weaning process has been no big deal...to her. I'm way more attached to it than she is, obviously. Over the past year I have had to watch what I put in my body. I can't have this right now, I won't have that. It was all for her. Now she's a big girl and only drinks milk to meet her dairy needs. A nursing mother is who I've been for the past year and now, in less than two weeks, it's all gone. Yes, I am ready to embrace my freedom, please don't misunderstand me. It's just hard to come to the realization that my little girl does not need me in that way anymore. I know some of you reading this think breastfeeding is weird and gross, blah, blah, blah. I was once that person. I never, and I mean never, intended on breastfeeding. Joe and my mother are the ones who convinced me to try it. Joe and I took a class and that's all it took. Once I learned all the great benefits it had to offer, I was forever changed. I was determined to give it a try and I told myself I would make it as long as I could. I prayed I could make it just 6 months. Then it became a competition within myself. The AAP recommends one year. Could I really do it? Well, that year has come and gone and here I am. I am so proud of myself because I know I helped make my daughter as healthy and as strong as she is by breastfeeding her. I was also fortunate to produce enough that I donated several hundred ounces to the Mothers Milk Bank of North Texas (http://www.mmbnt.org/). I would recommend it to anyone, and by "it" I mean breastfeeding as well as donating. The feeling is overwhelming; to know that I alone was the sole nutrition for Hana Grace for so many months. Sorry if I'm grossing you out, but those of you who are or ever have been a nursing mother, you know exactly what I'm talking about. I think it's that animal instinct. To know that all she needed to survive was me. Okay, this is sounding weirder and weirder by the sentence! LOL! So, okay, it's time for me to face the music and get over it. She's a big girl and from here on out I will care for her in so many other ways. This was merely a stepping stone in our relationship as mother and daughter.
A year ago at this time I suffered from what they call Baby Blues after giving birth to my beautiful daughter. Today I suffer from what I call Booby Blues. I have not nursed Hana Grace once today. I know I should be grateful, and I am, that the weaning process has been no big deal...to her. I'm way more attached to it than she is, obviously. Over the past year I have had to watch what I put in my body. I can't have this right now, I won't have that. It was all for her. Now she's a big girl and only drinks milk to meet her dairy needs. A nursing mother is who I've been for the past year and now, in less than two weeks, it's all gone. Yes, I am ready to embrace my freedom, please don't misunderstand me. It's just hard to come to the realization that my little girl does not need me in that way anymore. I know some of you reading this think breastfeeding is weird and gross, blah, blah, blah. I was once that person. I never, and I mean never, intended on breastfeeding. Joe and my mother are the ones who convinced me to try it. Joe and I took a class and that's all it took. Once I learned all the great benefits it had to offer, I was forever changed. I was determined to give it a try and I told myself I would make it as long as I could. I prayed I could make it just 6 months. Then it became a competition within myself. The AAP recommends one year. Could I really do it? Well, that year has come and gone and here I am. I am so proud of myself because I know I helped make my daughter as healthy and as strong as she is by breastfeeding her. I was also fortunate to produce enough that I donated several hundred ounces to the Mothers Milk Bank of North Texas (http://www.mmbnt.org/). I would recommend it to anyone, and by "it" I mean breastfeeding as well as donating. The feeling is overwhelming; to know that I alone was the sole nutrition for Hana Grace for so many months. Sorry if I'm grossing you out, but those of you who are or ever have been a nursing mother, you know exactly what I'm talking about. I think it's that animal instinct. To know that all she needed to survive was me. Okay, this is sounding weirder and weirder by the sentence! LOL! So, okay, it's time for me to face the music and get over it. She's a big girl and from here on out I will care for her in so many other ways. This was merely a stepping stone in our relationship as mother and daughter.
3 comments:
Many phases in life to come. Drive on Court.
i am thankful and proud of you that you changed our mind. I unfortunately haven't had the opportunity to experience breastfeeling, but I know that I would in a heartbeat. Knowing what the advantages are in the long run. I know the responsiblity is all yours and the contraints if might have on you but its soooo worth it. I am so glad and proud that you did that for my sweet and precious niece. Your simply the best...thanks Cort.
You have made a bond with your daughter that will last a lifetime...and it is soooooo worth it! I am so proud of my precious baby girl...what a beautiful, caring daughter and mother you have become! And now you have your very own baby girl to share with the world!! No matter how old she becomes, Hana will always be your "Baby Girl"....
Love you forever and a day,
mom
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